Step One Done

Today was a great day, long and rather intense, but GOOD, really positive and uplifting. Considering last week I was being written off, now I have a follow up appointment for January 4,2011! That's pretty cool! So looks like I'll be celebrating my 54th birthday (1/5/11) in Cleveland and that works for me!

They say the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step, so far I feel I've taken more than one step - and I feel I'm well on my way. I didn't feel safe and confident like this in Florida, I just know in my heart, I'm where I need to be and feel like I'm getting exactly what I need. The really odd part for me is that I don't feel the need to second guess the doctors - I trust them implicitely, which takes a lot of stress, worry and fear off my shoulders and I must say that feels really good.

You can't imagine how kind and compassionate everyone here is, not just the hospital staff, but everyone - it's just really a special place for me to be right now. I also have to say, I have never felt so loved and cared about. I am so overwhelmed by all the prayers, love, good wishes, flowers, visitors and help that has been pouring forth from so many people. I just never realized so many people cared about me like that. It feels really good and I can't begin to say how much all of this has helped. It's wonderful, thank you all so very much!

I feel really inspired, I'm ready to sketch a few ideas of some art pieces to work on when I get home. I've allowed myself to loose touch with my creative side over the years, but I need to get back in touch, because that's really a critical part of who I am.

So often things happen in life that are devasting or seem so at the time, because of our frame of reference - but sometimes when we make it to the other side of the event, we can see a positive aspect which wasn't visible before. It was like that for me when my father died, it was devasting at the time, but looking back it was a pivotal point in my life. So I feel this experience too will be something like that. I believe this is making me appreciate life more and I hope that in some way my experience will help someone else who may have to face similar things. That by knowing that I got through it perhaps it will be easier for them, less frightening and alone. That will give this an even more positive aspect. Regardless, every thing is happening exactly as it needs too, even though I can't see the whole picture. This is where faith and trust come in! I'm sitting in God's hand and I know he has it all under control, so I don't need to worry about anything, just relax and go with the flow.

Speaking of going with the flow, I'm ready to go to bed and get some sleep. I just feel so good, happy, content - I know that I have everything I need and I'm very grateful for that. Life is good!

Goodnight, I'll be back in the morning. Sleep well, I know I will!